It's A New Dawn, It's A New Day, It's A New Year. 0 comments

The 2009-recollection-blog had to come at some point...so here it is.

So here we are. Does anyone else actually believe it's the end of 2009 already? Has this year zoomed past (not necessarily a bad thing) for everyone else as well? Personally, for me, it feels like it has now, but, to be perfectly honest I think we all say that. Things always feel like they go really fast when you look back at them - but at the time they feel like they've been trudging along - perhaps the majority of 2009 was like this. Again, this isn't a bad thing, I'm not meaning it's went past slowly at snail pace because it's been so shite, it's been an amazing year - I dunno what I'm getting at here, I hope you all understand me...

To be honest, it only actually hit me that I left school around about (don't quote me on this) six months ago? I'm not sure if that's right, it might've been seven. But (and I don't think I was the only one who felt this) it was such an anti-climax! There really wasn't much to end or mark the six years we all spent there, that was really significant. Well, there was prom, I guess, but even then...but anyway, blasting of LHS aside, it kinda struck me that, since those months, I think I've changed just a wee bit. I'm not very good at the whole 'self-discovery/trying to change' thing, but I think, and this is probably because of the onset of university, I feel like I've become a little more self-assured. I hear the sniggers, I don't care, it kinda feels like it. Of course, that might be the only thing that's changed, I'm still that immature chubby wee boy who ran about with his schoolbag on his front whilst eating a cheese sandwich at heart (I bet all of you who didn't know me then wish you did now!).

Starting University was absolutely awesome as well - in doing so I came out've my shell just that wee bit more, and I met loads've new folk and made a load of new friends - it's where I met my absolutely braw girlfriend Kim as well (shout out much? hehe), so it's clear that Stirling Uni was a good move. That was definitely a highlight of this year, getting that big uni acceptance letter. Love it.

Of course, and there had to be some music tie in eventually, my music tastes have expanded way more this year. All these new people and all my old friends and my own curiosity are probably to blame for that, and I thank them all, I love my music now. And I'm actually making myself a promise ('cause this has happened too much in the past now) that I'm not letting anyone dictate that. If you don't like a band I like, tough - I won't change it. I won't rub it in your face either, but don't really expect me to change it.

There's been some crap times as well, obviously, but I feel like they've been helpful somewhat. I'm a big believer of 'everything happens for a reason', and so, whatever's happened this year, good or bad, it has led me to where I am now, which is in a very happy place. That doesn't change the fact that those times were bad, I'm not saying that, but we all learn from our mistakes and, inevitably, we stop doing them and end up in happy places. Like now!

Also, and I feel as if he deserves this, big shoutout to my dad and all his family as well - this Christmas was awesome, I had tons of fun with them, from papa's newspaper all the way to Roddy's master chef expertise. And to my dad, cheers for putting up with me staying with you, I am very very very grateful.

And to all my friends, new and old - I like where we are now. I'll admit, I don't speak to a lot of you as much as I should, which is rubbish, and it's probably my fault anyway and it'd be nice to change that - but I think this is a good starting point. So, thanks for all the braw times this year as well - the NB times, Firkins times, failed band starting times, watching Catchphrase times, sitting on benches at ridiculously early morning times, Group Tam times - everything. Lets see more of that in '10, eh? All of you, you're all braw, and I owe where I am now to a fair few of you - so danke, cheers, grazie, merci - I love you all.

Sure, this years had a massive share of ups and downs (who's hasn't?) and it's by no means been perfect, but I like to think it's been good for me - 2009 seems, on recollection, (and pardon the cheesy metaphor here) a runway. It's like, everything before's all been building up to this one point and after this, in 2010 everything takes off - it literally is a new year. From tomorrow - it's the future! I dunno if this is making any sense, I just have a feeling that next year is the start of something braw, the 'start of the rest of my life' to put a cheesy spin on it.

So, and this has dragged on a little - I applaud you if you've reached here - I leave you now, wishing you a very happy new year and many returns (what does that even mean?). Hope you have all enjoyed this rather stretched out insight to my year.

Mark, out.
xxx

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Now playing: Dirty Vegas - Days Go By (Acoustic)
via FoxyTunes

Someday The Dream Will End 0 comments

Hello all, it's been a couple of days since my (some would say unsuccessful, I would say titanic) post that was the 12 Days of Christmas...

Anyway, it's just a quick post to point out the fact that I've added a YouTube link up above on the navbar, where, the videos of my drunken family reside - and sometime soon (I'm hoping!) some nice, new, tasty vlogs for you all to ponder over. Yes, Mark is going digital! (what?)

Also, I thought I'd share this strange dream I had with you last night...I had to repeat primary school. It was extremely odd, considering I was the same age as I am now, and the teacher was treating me like a five year old - however! In the playground I forged friendships, played tig, ran about like a lunatic and saw my good chum Calum at the 'big playground' (this was where, in my primary school, the P4-7s would be at breaktime). It was both odd yet, extremely poignant (just wanted to use that word...). And the reason I had to repeat primary school was to 'find skills I had not yet learned', which came straight from the mouth of the headteacher. It was an odd dream, to say the least...

Another wee point, my writing mojo's back again (how many times have I said this I wonder?) so Black Sky chapters are expecting to be shot out, hopefully. Also since Christmas, I joined FarmVille. That is all I wish to say on that matter, for fear of being rocked.

Mark, out.
xxx

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Now playing: Craig Armstrong - Glasgow Love Theme
via FoxyTunes

An Extremely Late 12 Days Of Christmas 0 comments

Actually, now that I say that, it's not really late considering this is the beginning of the 12 Days Of Christmas, but y'know, seeing as I said to you all I'd unveil it all on Xmas day...here's the last verse.

On the 12th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Twelve droids a-beeping,
Eleven Santas singing,
Ten pairs of shoes,
Nine Dylans bobbing,
Eight inches of snow,
Morgan Freeman's voicebox,
Cloud's Buster Sword,
Jack Bauer's Dammit!
Four moogles pompoms,
Three Metal Gear Rexs,
Two penguins rapping,
And Chewbacca singing Hey Jude!

It's been a journey, hope everyone had a brilliant Xmas/Boxing Day, and Santa was good to you all!

Mark, out.
xxx

On The 2nd Day Of Christmas 0 comments

Happy Christmas Eve everyone! Again, posting totally slipped my mind last night, so here goes nothing.

On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Two penguins rapping.


Heh, can you imagine them? All up at the North Pole chillin' with their homies? Poppin' a cap in an unsuspecting seal? Bustin' out the rhymes? Movin' glaciers with their ghetto blastas? Completely stereotypical view of rappers aside, I think that'd be cool. Moving on.

Anyway, merry Christmas to you when it comes...the finished version will be available tomorrow for all you Snowflakes and Semiquaver fanatics :)

Mark, out.
xxx

It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas 0 comments

I FOUND MY PS1 MEMORY CARD! YAY!

Mark, out.
xxx

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Now playing: Snow Patrol - The Lightning Stirke
via FoxyTunes

The 4th and 3rd Days 0 comments

Whooooooops, I somehow managed to completely forget posting anything yesterday, I deserve a holiday though! (from the excruciating hard work that is blogging, yes.)

Anyway, what I had planned for the fourth day was this!

On the 4th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Four moogle's pompoms.

And if you don't know what a moogle is...well you can see him to the left. He's nothing compared to Maxy though. How cool are moogles? How unbelievable would it be to have a pet one? A wee cute bear with a pompom on its head that would could conjure giant books and tents on call, answered to a flute and delivered your mail? Manual labour aside, I think he would be a fine companion. Kup-ooooo!



Anyway, back to the song, it's actually getting increasingly difficult to write down the reflected opinions of everyone else in these lyrics (mainly because it's things that I like that are included in them now) and mainly because of the little input I've given other people...so here goes nothing. Asking a random friend...

Well, I'm guessing if you got three of these for your Christmas, you'd be questioning your true love's intentions, or fleeing the country. And I have a picture to show you why.


On the third day of Christmas,
my true love gave to me,
Three Metal Gear Rexes.

Yep. The picture says it all. I'm liking the absolutely huge contrast between this one and the moogle up top. Which would you prefer, I wonder?

In addition, cheers goes to Smyles, for thinking up the most terrifying present known to man.

Mark, out.
xxx



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Now playing: Foreign Slippers - Two People In You
via FoxyTunes

On the 5th Day Of Christmas... 0 comments

The line on the new 5th day of Christmas needs to be epic - it needs to match the ultimate scream of 'FIIIIVE GOLDEN RINGGGSSS!' in the line to line playback...so what could be as epic as that? What could your true love give to you for Christmas that would beat five golden rings?

On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
JACK BAUER'S DAMN IT!

'Nuff said. You knew there was gonna be a 24 related line eventually, right?

Also, thought I'd share my mental news with you, I was pishpishpished last night (I am now suffering the effects :|) yet, I managed to walk home from the Martell back to my house in the freezing cold and frozen snow and ice - without feeling cold at all, or falling/slipping. And the whole walk felt really short, but that's probably 'cause I needed to pee that badly. I think that's quite an accomplishment after 13 bottles of beer, two vodka and cokes, one vodka and red bull, three jack daniels and coke and three shots of tequila. What's even more surprising here is that, as hungover now and drunk as I was last night, I can remember all those things I had to drink. Wowza.

Mark, out.
xxx

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Now playing: Queens of the Stone Age - Auto Pilot
via FoxyTunes

On the 6th Day Of Christmas... 0 comments

There's heavy snow falling in Larbet today! It's amazing! So, in light of this, a thought came to mind...what if I was snowed in? What would be the only way out? A snow plough? No, I think not. I'm thinking something more violent. Something more harsh. Something Final Fantasy related...

On the sixth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Cloud's Buster Sword.

Aye, you just try to fucking snow me in now.
Mark, out.
xxx

Thank You For The Music! (03) 0 comments

LIKEOMG50THPOST!

It's been a while since I've done a TYFTM post, mainly because there have been so many good albums and songs I've heard over the past few months. So, seeing as it's coming up for the new year and all, I figured it'd be a good idea to make a compilation of sorts. So, rather than focusing on the one album, I'm gonna mention a number of songs and bands, that have had quite an effect on me this year. So, what I'm gonna do is make a list of SOME of my favourite musical discoveries/albums/songs/bands of this year - everyone else is doing it, so why can't I? I'll throw in some links as well for you to hear 'em too. (Song titles/Band names that are bold throughout this post'll have links on them, give them a click!)

First, the bands -

1. The Shins - Probably could now be regarded as one of my favourite bands. Although they've been about on my iTunes/iPod for a few years, I'd never listened to them once (I got a big bunch of music from my uncle a couple of years back that kinda lay dormant on my laptop for quite a while) - but then, as I happily shuffled through my songs, The Past and Pending came on out've nowhere - and I, as cheesy as I can be, was transported. This song is absolutely amazing. Stripped down to an acoustic guitar w/ vocals, and another few instruments, the song's got quite a calm feel to it, and it's perfect for reflecting/thinking/walking/writing/drawing/getting a train/sleeping/anything. And the lyrics are pretty awesome as well ("In matters of love loss, we've no recourse at all"/"lose yourself in lines dissecting love."). In short, this song is one of my favourite songs of all time, and the rest of them are pretty fantastic as well - New Slang, Pink Bullets and Caring Is Creepy. I've never gotten tired of this band, ever, and they're pretty well suited for any mood or time of day.
2. Citizen Cope - I wouldn't count myself a massive fan as I'm not too much into them, but the two songs that I really really like are pretty smashing - they were also both in One Tree Hill, incidentally. Sideways is my favourite of the two, it's moody, mopey and pretty damn awesome - also, Santana have done a cover, but the wailing guitars take away from the rest of the music a bit. "These diamonds they fade/Flowers they bloom" - bloody brilliant. Son's Gonna Rise is another, more up-tempo song of there's which is also pretty good. I'll need to find out some other songs of theirs...
3. Bob Dylan - Ha, yeah, believe it or not, quite recently I've started listening to this dude a hell of a lot more than I used to or would've before. There's not a lot I can say that other people haven't already, but Don't Think Twice, It's Alright and Hurricane are definite favourites.
4. Alex Day - Click here for his YouTube link - you might've seen him as nerimon on there as well. His music is absolutely amazing! Holding On and No More are the two favourites off of his album (I bought it 'cause he's THAT good) - the lyrics are cute, funny, amazing, great, brilliant - "Sat under this tree with you, the rain is on our faces and I can't think of a single place where I would rather be." - a freakishly odd coincidental lyric that happened to explain my exact feelings on the 1st of November. Nice one. Buy his music, you won't regret it.

They're probably my best discoveries as of late - album wise, for my favourites this year it'd have to be -

1. The Shins - Oh, Inverted World
2. Elliot Smith - New Moon (Not necessarily this year, as I first heard Angel In The Snow [YOU HAVE TO LISTEN TO THAT SONG - it's amazing] in '08, but I started listening to the actual album more this year, and it's pretty phenomenal.)
3. Damien Rice - O (Again, not a new one, but it's been on more this year than it's ever been.)
4. Kasabian - The West Rider Pauper Lunatic Asylum
5. Placebo - Battle For the Sun
6. Led Zeppelin - Led Zeppelin I
7. Ryan Adams - Demolition
8. Jack's Mannequin - Everything In Transit
9. Foals - Antidotes
10. The Beatles - Help!
11. Nobuo Uematsu - FFVII/VIII/IX/X/FFVIIAC OSTs and Piano Collections (lets face it, they're gonna be there every year)
12. The Cribs - Men's Needs, Women's Needs, Whatever
13. Aqualung - Aqualung
14. Harvey Danger - Where Have All The Merrymakers Gone?
15. Michael Buble - Crazy Love

Saying that, that's only a small taster of my favourite albums/bands this year. It's probably pretty damn impossible to track 'em all down, and I've more than likely forgotten some of them.

Mark, out.
xxx

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Now playing: Jack's Mannequin - Kill the Messenger
via FoxyTunes

On the 7th Day Of Christmas... 0 comments

So here we are, a week before the big day (it's actually quite unbelievable how fast December's went by), and it's time for another line of the chart-topping extraordinaire that will be named, rather un-originally (and if anyone can think of a better title then tell me, my creative well to do with things festive is slowly running empty...) 'Mark's 12 Days of Christmas'.

Seven swans a-swimming you say?

On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Morgan Freeman's voicebox.

Although that looks somewhat gory and like the beginnings of an excellent news story (Man steals Morgan Freeman's Voicebox - Panic Ensues!), can you imagine it? You wake up on Christmas morning to see Morgan Freeman (seeing his voicebox would be kinda disgusting), rocking back and forward on the rocking chair in front of the fire, a festive looking jumper on, singing the words to your favourite Christmas carols? Lets face it, the man's voice is epic. Or, you do get his voicebox as a present and you replace yours with his - imagine the new paths open to you then! Voiceovers! M&S adverts!

Mark, out.
xxx


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Now playing: City & Colour - The Girl
via FoxyTunes

On the 8th Day Of Christmas... 2 comments

Here's something we all want eight of for Christmas, never mind eight maids a-milking -

On the eighth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Eight inches of snow.

You may think that's one too many syllables but if you say 'Eight inches' really quickly and make it form the one word it almost, almost fits. And lets face it, it's getting around the time where it should really bloody snow. And if it can snow in Dundee today it can bloody well snow in Larbert.

Mark, out.
xxx

A Big Festive Cheers! 0 comments

I knew we could do it! Yep, although hardly a huge number, my blog views have nicely shot up past the 1K mark! So thank you all who have been following/reading/recently commenting, albeit forced from me sometimes (is that how you use the word 'albeit'? always wondered).

Anyway, realised I hadn't done much in the way of proper posts recently, but I'll sort that by Saturday with the unbelievably cliched 'Top Lists' that everyone seems to be doing - might as well get my favourite songs out there as well!

Also, totally forgot to mention to you all that Placebo was awesome! Here's the set list - it was alright, kinda gutting they didn't play Nancy Boy or Because I Want You, but the stuff they played off of Battle For The Sun was pretty fantastic. They played The Bitter End as well, which, being my favourite song of theirs, was really quite fun. The crowd was absolutely dire though, there was a small concentration group of people in the middle of the hall who were jumping, the other couple 'o hundred people there must never had heard any of Placebo's songs before because they just stood quite wide-eyed and bored looking. And there was also this guy with really long hair and shite eye makeup who didn't know the words at all but continued to mouth along. I was contemplating stopping Placebo just to go 'he's a phoney!'

Another point, you want to know what happened on the train to me the other day? Some guy told me turn my iPod down! Seriously! It was The Shins! Who wants to turn The Shins down?!

Mark, out.
xxx

(I also got my hair cut for the first time since prom today!)

On the 9th Day Of Christmas... 1 comments

Wee bit of a musical tie in this one, it came to me the other night and I'm rather proud.

On the ninth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Nine Dylans Bobbing.

I like it!

Mark, out.
xxx

On the 10th Day Of Christmas... 1 comments

As is Kim's want, I have the next line of my (soon to be great) Xmas Number One.

On the 10th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Ten pairs of shoes.

I'm beginning to think I've got the wrong Christmas present here.

Mark, out.
xxx

On the 11th Day Of Christmas... 0 comments

Cheers Darren!

On the 11th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Eleven santas singing.

Keep commenting me guys!

Mark, out.
xxx


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Now playing: 30 Seconds To Mars - Hurricane (Featuring Kanye West)
via FoxyTunes

A Winter Wonderland 0 comments

Oh-My-Actual-God. I actually think it might be the coldest it's ever been ever tonight. I walked outside and the juices that are in there with your brain froze over, along with my blood, my saliva and my ears. In effect, I have actually become a huge and gargantuan iceberg whilst going to and from Stirling tonight. (It's actually only really really cold, and I haven't frozen over or anything. It did grab your attention though.)

Anyways, while I was walking back from the train station tonight, I realised, Larbert is a pretty minging place in Winter. I mean, I was strolling through the precinct all cheery with my Xmas music on when suddenly, the asthmatic-dog-exhaust-piped-cars suddenly barged into the car park as quick as the hooded people chanting 'Sephiroth' got to the Northern Cave in FFVII. And my headphones are pretty loud and I still heard them. Then, after that, I walked past Chillies to find a few 'neebers' throwing donner meat at each other exclaiming 'wur havin a fuckin mental food fight n aw that pish wi this shitey food aye?', which was both entertaining and somewhat disturbing. And then, as if that just wasn't enough, there was a pram with a baby in it. On its own. Outside a pub. You heard me right. I'm assuming the mum or dad had just took a stroll inside to get a drink, a fag, watch the X Factor, play some darts, deal some drugs, start a bar brawl or sing a horrendous rendition of Neil Diamond, and decided that the baby shouldn't be involved. For one, it's like, minus one hundred and forty degrees and there's this poor baby outside the pub cooing happily/shivering. I hope that parent is ready to embrace a nice chunk of ice when he/she eventually leaves/gets flung out said pub. Can you say that? Yeah, why not.

Also, you know what really pisses me off? When people in buses play music on their phones. WHAT IS THE POINT? Usually, you see a cheeky wee set of earphones over their football top as well. And it's always the same people! Not meaning to stereotype here (well, I am), but it's always that guy (usually on his own) with the black canvas jacket, the golden hoop, the fag balancing on the ear, and the painfully white shoes, which are tapping happily along next to a half empty bottle of buckfast, or god help us all, lambrini. Or, it's the group of, lets say thirteen? year old girls with the exact same physical traits as our previously described friends, except these girls all sound like grown men and shout everything the say. Probably because their music is so goddamn loud. And it's crap music too, it's not even decent dance. No one wants to hear it. I will applaud when someone plays their music on a bus and 'Don't Stop Believing' or 'Stairway to Heaven' comes on.

Mark, out.
xxx

On the 12th Day Of Christmas... 1 comments

Yeah, so I know today isn't the actual 12th Day of Christmas (I don't think that's actually till January at some point) but this is my version of this song in a vain bid to create a masterpiece that will knock RATM, SuBo and whoever wins the X Factor off the charts (I wish).

So the 12th day is now, going all the way down to the 1st day on Christmas day, if you get my drift.

So, rather than my true love sending me twelve drummers drumming, which I probably would appreciate, I think I'd prefer something like this...

On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love sent to me,
Twelve droids a-beeping.

'cause lets face it, who wouldn't want a droid helping them out with the Christmas shopping blitz right now? Yes, I can see it now, a little C3PO going crazy in Glasgow -

"I'm programmed for etiquette, not shopping!"

If anyone has any ideas for the next 11 days, give me a comment on this blog post. Seriously. Just do it. It'd be nice!

Mark, out.
xxx

Jingle All The Way 0 comments

MARK'S OFFICIAL XMAS COUNTDOWN! - 16 DAYS!

So here's an idea -

There's all this craziness going on in the music industry right now about the 'XMAS NUMBER ONE' (sorry, had to bold that out 'cause it made it look frightening and epic), and have you noticed how weird the odds/predictions are? (taken from the William Hill website...don't know why I'm on this.)

Firstly, without the X Factor, the Xmas Number One's are at -

• Rage Against the Machine (?!) - at 1/3
• Lady Gaga - at 5/1
• Susan Boyle - at 6/1

Also, bets including the X Factor winner are at -

• X Factor Winner - at 1/5
• Rage Against the Machine (?!) - at 10/3
• Susan Boyle - at 25/1

Now, I'm of course not slating the almighty RATM (*bows down*), but, just a random thought here - whatever happened to Christmas music?

Obviously, I'd welcome Rage to become Xmas number one - imagine that, poor crazy Stacey Solomon bumbling all her way to become the winner and then, with the unbelievable outpour of random, jumbled up letters that is the way she speaks, she suddenly exclaims in shock that 'Killing In The Name' has just taken the position of Number One. It'd be terrific.

But, my point here, whatever happened to actual Christmas music? Sure, there's the odd chance that SuBo may do an Xmas song, but I don't see Lady Gaga doing one, and Rage's song for number one is already 'Killing In The Name'. So why doesn't anyone do Christmas music anymore? What happened to it? Why is it that every year, rather than creating a new, beautiful masterpiece of an Xmas jingle, all we get is Paul Potts or the legend that is Daniel O'Donnell covering every damn Christmas song that's been released? Where's the originality here? How on earth did all the ideas for a Christmas song suddenly disappear?

Needless to say, it's probably not the case and there have been Xmas songs released in the past couple of years that have been alright and I've just missed them - but still, the point I'm getting to here is the fact that no one releases decent Christmas songs anymore. Imagine if a new (and actually decent) Christmas song hit number one, instead of the God-awfulness that is Lady Gaga, or, Heaven forbid, Stacey/Olly/Joe. Blasphemy aside, I think it'd be good, if there was someone out there...someone reading this blog thinking, 'wait, I know what he's talking about!'...someone with an idea that would change Christmas forever...someone, with the best sounding Christmas jingle rattling in their skulls, waiting to be released...my friend, if you are out there, then do it. Make Christmas history. And see the look of horror on Simon Cowells face.

It's probably never gonna happen though, so support Rage Against the Machine for Xmas number one all the way!

Anyway, some quick updates, Uni is now officially over (if I haven't mentioned that already) until the 15th of February - so hopefully a lot more blog posts and things. The imagination well for previously coined up personal writing project has ran dry (no idea how considering it was based on my life) and, as it would seem, Black Sky is back in the mix. Same with the game based on Black Sky that is tottering slowly along.

Another point relevant to this blog, from the 13th all the way to the 25th, I'm going to re-write the '12 Days of Christmas' (I know these days aren't the 12 Days Of Christmas, but I don't care), so anyone with any ideas on what you would want for Christmas rather than a partridge in a pear tree, facebook/blog comment/myspace/bebo me with suggestions. I won't bite.

Mark, out, thinking he needs to get his grammar sorted, and wonders if this new sign out line is better than the last.
xxx


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Now playing: Five - Everybody Get Up
via FoxyTunes

Yo Mista Claus, We Is Gonna Pimp Yo Ride! 1 comments

Just humour me here, for a while.

Imagine, you and your burberry-clad homies decide to go for a riotous, mental, bass-pounding night out at the almighty FALKIRK CRUISE. Now, I have absolutely no idea what this strange night out entails, and I don't know what happens on said 'cruise' - all I do know is after 8pm on a Saturday/Friday night, the Retail Park's car park becomes flooded with, and I quote my sister on this, 'like total modded cars n aw that aye?'

Take note here, when I say 'modded', I don't mean 'modded' in the sense of a James Bond car, with ejector seats and machine guns, nor do I mean 'modded' in regards to the shenanigans of West Coast Customs and XZibit (no idea how that's meant to be written down) in the almighty Pimp My Ride. What I mean by 'modded' is a faded neon pink Corsa with an awkwardly placed spoiler, a set of ugly neon lights that don't match the cars colour flickering horribly underneath it, a sound system that only seems to take the 'Bass' option into consideration and, as such has horrifically maxed-out bass sounds spewing from the windows - and finally, who could forget the shite exhaust pipe that sounds like an asthmatic dog. Running.

But yeah, back into context here, here you are with your friends, or 'neebers', and suddenly, out've nowhere pops Santa. Yes, there you are 'pumping up the beats' and, out of the blue comes Santa Claus in his sleigh. But this is no ordinary sleigh. This sleigh has been 'pimped' out beyond belief yo! Made by Q and X-Zibit (that looks a bit more gangsta than the last spelling), this titanium reinforced sleigh is equipped with the latest in gadgetry and armaments. On either side are six rocket-propelled missile launchers, which can lock onto to any target. Bulletproof windshields with razor window-wipers that can fly off and attack foes like boomerangs. A sound system with 145 amplifiers shaped like Christmas gifts, and, the most important accessory of all, furry dice dangling from the rear-view mirror. Let us not forget the reindeer. The genetically modified beasts (presumably modded by X to the Z - he seems the type) have forty nitrous oxide canisters attached to their legs, enabling them to reach top speeds of one thousand and forty six miles per hour. Not only this, but they have small robotic elves riding them, armed with machine guns and laser cannons. And, finally, in the carriage itself, Santa, who sits next to a precariously placed ejector seat. There's also some room in the back for a pool containing sharks with laser beams attached to their heads. Take that, Falkirk Cruise.

Anyway, nonsense aside, I've suddenly had an amazing idea to make every blog post up to the glorious day of the 25th of December - Christmas - 'festive related'. So expect some more insane, seasonal blog posts from the kaleidoscopic sensation that is my brain.

On another note, a video of me eating jalapenos will available at some point because all you buggers who didn't vote for Danyl made it so. Don't know when yet, it may not be made till I'm seventy four, but I promised you a video of me eating jalapenos if Danyl did not win the X Factor.

D'you reckon if I post it he'll visit me and get me a Christmas card? *dreams*

Mark, out, with a ho ho ho and a nagging thought questioning what the hell that blog post was about.
xxx

Seasons Greetings 0 comments

Hello everyone! It's only been what, coming up to two weeks? Sorry about this, I've had one valid excuse - I did have three essays, which, to be fair, only got done a couple of days back. Education, English, and Linguistics - and guess what?! I done 'em all, not even the night before, all in good time and ready to be printed. As Barrett would say, 'I AM THE MAN!' Or something like that, we're all too confused as to why he's leaving a voicemail on Cloud's mobile phone all about oil. And to be honest, when you were playing Final Fantasy VII, do you remember seeing any oil fields? Yeah, another excuse for my non-blog posting is just general laziness, I've been without a creative spark for a while and really, I had somewhat better things to do...but hey, lookie here, Mark's back! ...with a vengeance.

Anyway, I'm sure you all noticed the very cheery flashy picture, just a shoutout from everyone here at S&S (well, just me, really) to have an excellent holiday time! Although, saying that, everyone still at High School/Primary School are still there, whereas moi! is now on holiday till the 15th of February. Very, very good times! Well, this was just a wee quickie, there'll be more in the next few days (promise!), probably of me eating a jar of jalapenos, if you all remember that shite promise I made to you all about Danyl getting booted off of the X Factor. Fan-bloody-tastic.

This is Mark, saying he's stealing Smyles's sign-off line to say have a happy holiday season!
xxx

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